Friday, July 2, 2010
The true story behind the band
A long time ago in a far away land, Davy (guitar-playing hyrax enthusiast) was hunting female meerkats in the savannah behind Smallville (a suburb off-campus at Daystar Uni). The brilliant idea to form a band came to him, which he decided to share with Diallo (who played nyatiti at the time for Kalenjin Sisters). Initially, LYT was a semi-professional wrestling team, but after being beaten by their bitter rivals, Chizi (who was working as an intern with Legio Maria) and Ruto (groupie manager, who also sold stolen hairclips for a living). They decided to give up the sweaty, testosterone-driven ring for the uber-sweaty, testosterone-drenched stage. Strangely, a cultural poet from the West called Tomi (a professional pineapple eater) arrived on the scene with the revelation that LYT would become one of the country’s biggest acts ever. Before this came to be, however, the world reknown hunter-gatherer Mahia plundered their village, stealing Davy’s pet goose and panther. It was a tough battle, and Davy had to recruit his precious pet llamas to his army. It was tough especially because the troops preferred to have lengthy face-off battles dancing the gully creeper. After two years of truces, trading daughters for dowry and watching Sponge-bob Squarepants together and dancing to Kwasa Kwasa by Kanda Bongo Man...the group was nearly complete. Only the percussionist remained. And they found Stan breaking stones by hand under a mangrove tree. They bribed him with an over-ripe guava. LYT’s legacy then truly began.
p.s. but Tomi left to focus on his career in pineapple-eating, and is now a regional champion.